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May 26, 2018
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Steps to Resolve Relational Conflict

Craig Hill • Balancing Family & Work
Husbands and wives communicate differently. Here is a tool that will help in conflicts.

For a Wife:

1. Stop accusing and ask questions.

2. "I sense that I've made you feel like you're not acceptable in my sight and I don't appreciate for efforts. Is that true?"

3. "Please share with me: How did I make you feel?"

4. "At the time I didn't realize that I was making you feel falsely accused, and unappreciated. But now I can see that that is exactly what I did. I'm so sorry. Will you forgive me? (You may ask specific forgiveness for criticizing, rejecting, accusing, or ungratefulness, whichever words are most pertinent in the current situation.)

5. "Thankyou so much for all you do for me and our family. You're an awesome husband."(Thank him for the specific things he has done to love and care for you.)

For a husband:

1. Don't try to answer her question. Answer the question with a question.

2. "By the tone of your voice, I sense that I've hurt you. Is that true?"

3. "Please share with me: How did I make you feel?"

4. "At the time, I didn't realize that I made you feel (Repeat the feelings she shared with you). But now I can see that that is exactly what I did. I'm so sorry. Will you please forgive me? (You may ask forgiveness for the specific ways she has shared you made her feel not loved, uncared for, or not listened to.)

5. I love you, and the last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you, or make you feel like I don't love you or care about you.

Source: Craig Hill, Family Foundations International www.familyfoundations.com

Recommended Resource
(Click on bookstore icon to the right to order this and other resources)

Two Fleas & No Dog, by Craig Hill

This is a practical book in which Craig Hill presents three key elements that will reignite in your marriage the fulfillment, security, and stress-free environment you had always hoped for: COVENANT, COMMUNICATION, and CONFLICT RESOLUTION.


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